I went out, and slept with my sunglasses on
So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial.
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
im sorry, I just can't fuck a guy who can't receive picture messages
The whiskey is fighting the tequila on who wants to be the one who end my night first.
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
Thank you for making it possible for me to get laid while having peace of mind my dog is well taken care of.
Nothing like waking up naked and alone on your floor to remind you that you make life mistakes often.
Just walked into the library with a case of Strawberitas in hand.. no one said a word.. I think they were just impressed I knew where the library was
I have the WORST cramps EVER. I think this is gods way of saying 'you're welcome, last warning. stop being a slut.'
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
Do you know how many guys' fantasies I've been told I'm a part of lately?!
Just 2. But still.
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
Randomize
