1:12am: That's just how i roll, and this dress she is wearing is dirty and needs to get pulled over her head.
Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
do people really wait til 5 oclock to start drinking in real life?
Although, to be fair, I am both willing and going to lick marshmallow fluff off of your dick.
We made a bong out of a plastic football. I can honestly say we make a good team.
I THINK I JUST JOINED A GANG. PLEASE PICK ME UP.
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
That sad moment when even your drug dealer lands a summer internship and you don't...
So this tall girl jumped in our cab and I was like hey I have pics of u on my phone. It wasn't creepy at all
I haven't taken a solid shit in four weeks. Do you know what started four weeks ago? Alcohol and dining hall food. Fucking college.
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
id like to think im the only pot dealing prostitute that is also an ordained minister. but maybe not. what a time to be alive
Yo whoever left a thong on the dining room table, first of all get help second of all please remove it now
That was the first time i’ve been physically intimidated by a LinkedIn profile.
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