I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
He came in looking for condoms, iced coffee, and a gas tank. I need to be where he's going.
don't worry i just saved a song to my personal usb drive to give to the dj at the bar. he's playing old school jlo whether he likes it or not.
It's been hot as balls outside. It's like getting tea bagged by the Sun.
We found Kyle. He was next door yelling at the elderly couple to let him continue his golf game. No more afternoon drinking for him.
Two shots of gin says this is gonna be a sloppy lab write up.
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
Got hit on by the cable guy. Solid 9. Think Orlando Bloom with a glorious curly mullet.
I don't want anything calamari shaped after last night. But I appreciate the Cheerios offer.
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
He's literally cuddling with the washer and dryer.
Watching Colbert Report and porn at the same time.
Randomize
