At a bar where three women in denim shorts are debating techniques and skillsets for wrangling goats. You stay classy Delaware.
come back what if one of your parents walks in and im just sitting here eating a cheesesteak without you
I'll have my TA grade the tests, she needs something to do anyway. Wanna race to the bar on segways?
there's a guy in the del taco parking lot doing pushups. let's be his friends
Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night?
he told me "apparently my gag reflex doesn't work so if you magically grew a penis I would deep throat you"
No I have an idea, I saw you running through the neighborhood at 3am while I searched for my flip flops in a ditch
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
Getting "I couldn't find the front door so I climbed in through window" drunk seems to be a habit of yours
Sorry you ended up in detox. It's not my fault you decided to walk downtown in only your underwater at 3am. I think the tequila took over.
I was pretty pissed in the morning when I realized he had fucked the fake tattoo right off my chest.
Listen, yo... we need to have a serious conversation about this Dollar Store toilet paper. Because if I’m going to finger someone’s ass, it’s not going to be my own.
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