He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
im goin to the NYE party with a tuxedo painted on my body. i know a girl who does it. wanna join?
Set off the fire alarm in our dorm at 2:30 am last night. 150 Naked people wrapped in towels shared a bag of popcorn with me as we watched the firefighters frantically search for my burnt popcorn in the building.
OMG THAT WAS YOU?!
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
My heart is having a hard time convincing my vagina he's not worth it.
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
I have a surprise for you
Is it drugs? I want drugs. Or a puppy!
I legitimately forgot how to blow my nose just now. Sleep might be handy.
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
Why is there puke in my guitar?
Because you puked in your guitar.
On the plus side, I know I'm allergic to latex now. Like really fucking allergic
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
He didn't even get to the first chorus of Hotel California before he started convulsing on top of me.
I had a dream I hooked up with Post Malone. I can still smell the dream
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