OK WHO CHANGED MY RING TONE TO LADY AND THE TRAMP AND CHANGED EVERY CONTACT IN MY PHONE TO 'SOME GUY I FUCKED'?
He stumbled into my room, flopped on my bed, shoes on my pillow and asked me for a juice box. Then fell asleep with the juice box on his forehead.
You can't text people with drinkers' regret at 8 in the morning. It's just bad form.
I don't know what to say to that. All I know is my vagina is trying to jump through the phone.
Dude! I just figured out I can successfully hide a 4oz flask between my boobs without endangering my cleavage! College: conquered!
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
I say "glasses of whiskey" like I didn't chug it out of the bottle
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
You will drink beer in a kiddie pool in your back yard but you wont bring a girl home
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
This is not the first time I've recognized my body is subconsciously trying to make pizza.
I can't have the last guy who touched my vagina be my coworker.
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
You know you started drinking too early in the day when you have a hangover at midnight
thats called having FUN
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