Come to the Burger King. We're waiting for you.
Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
you ate skittles off the table like a hungry hungry hippo. it was awesome.
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
No, I'm in the bathroom trying to scrub off the 16 tally marks on my wrist so its not so obviously to the world that I puked on a couch last night.
I have a beer in one hand and a slim fast in another. It's another one of those wednesday nights.
I knew I fucked up when I woke up with the meat scissors in my hand.
I think I'm interested in anyone that recognizes I actually have a pulse
I'm pleased to know that your mom refers to me as "the ass piliager" now
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
EX BOYFRIEND'S TWINS WERE BORN TODAY. THIS CALLS FOR A MARG.
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
How does one take the "you're the best sex I've ever had but I'm marrying someone that's sub-par in the sack" mind fuck?
I pity the fool.
Thanks Mr T.
My moral compass kept pointing to his penis.
I'm either hallucinating or there is a dying cat outside my apartment....
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