omg so im topless lying on my bed and i forgot my nail clippers are on my bed and i just leaned forward and the nail clipper closed. on my nipple. ouch
come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
You're being dramatic. You can calm down, or you can piss off. Either way, I ate your burrito.
you screamed santa and jumped in front of 50 kids to tell him you wanted a bong for christmas.
i DID try to find you last night. i asked where you were and you texted me the letter "e" and a picture of the dark.
she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous
I should start riding the bus again so I can drink all day
Remind me never to take that much Vicodin ever again. I laid in bed measuring my heart rate for an hour and a half because I was afraid it would stop.
Are you having sex right now? Or is the apt just swaying rhythmically on its own? Either way, awesome.
You rolled around in the grass BEFORE we went in and said it was because "ladies love that eau de earth"
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
I got wing sauce on the baby and licked it off. If you were wondering how I'm doing.
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
Randomize
