my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom
They asked if I wanted to shotgun a beer and before i could ask who had a knife they all had bit holes into the cans. Im never leaving Germany!
How is it I was the last to know everyone calls me tig ole bitties? Did y'all have a meeting about this that I wasn't invited to?
Party was cancelled. Me and my dog are high as tits. Wanna go roam the outlet mall?
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
I swear 95% of pictures on my phone are from drunken nights I don't remember with me doing a peace sign alone in somebody's bedroom.
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
The kind of drunk where you put two tampons in thinking that it'll last me longer ...
somehow attending a funeral viewing turned into me snorting cocaine in the bathroom and drawing ninja turtles for children
How do you initiate sexting are u supposed to be like yo I'm peeing and eating a clif bar and texting and thinking about you naked all at the same time
i projectile vomited shoeless at 7:30 a.m. in a taco bell parking lot. never again.
Instead of going to my moms birthday party I went over and gave him head. I should win non girlfriend of the year award
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