it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
I mixed the ketchup wit the mustard in one bottle to save time making hotdogs
Just tried to fight the dj at cowboys because he would'nt play freebird. Pick me up now.
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
I only want to make out with him. Unless I get hungry. In that case I will take him home and screw him as a distraction from eating.
Someone painted a weed leaf on my leg with red paint. Or blood. I hope paint.
Holy fuck just found a used tampon in the leg of my pants. it's not paint. It's. Not. Paint.
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
How sad is it that I'm looking in the farm & garden section of craigslist to find a weed dealer. I mean, that's where they'd be right? Just gotta break the code.
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
You kept asking her which dick pills worked the best. She's a grandmother.
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
Getting a lap dance from a girl you went to high school with really isn't as awkward as you'd think
And she called me out by name, nothing could have made it more awkward but it ended up not being that bad
tell him if he brings over dinner you might let him see your left boob...or right, whichever you prefer. But under no circumstances do you let him see both...unless he brings a good desert...like coffee ice cream or something
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
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