Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
high people should be assigned attendants
In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
I think I explained what happened in the voicemail. But I think I might have just cried and ranted about how cool osiris shoes are
In my drunkeness I was planning how to throw up without my parents hearing. I was gonna go for a "run" and just throw up outside.
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
We were eating hotdog buns dipped in French onion dip in lawn chairs at 4am. That drunk
Attention ladies coming to the party tonight! Tonight will be another chance to win the 5 bucks for getting my cousin hard. Bring your a-game, no one has been able to overcome the whiskey dick yet. Good luck.
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
I Can't even believe I threw all my pizza rolls at her, I mean not only did i ruin a good meal but now I dont have anymore
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
I put in a tampon while driving a moving vehicle. I feel like this is simultaneously a new low and the sort of feat that deserves a merit badge.
Nice. I like it when Maker's Mark makes decisions for you.
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
I would accept a super bowl ring as an engagement ring
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