If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
you dialed the number "23" then talked to it for three minutes
I'm in the liquor aisle and a 10 yr old boy yells, "My favorite beer is Corona! Daddy remember when you gave me some on our camping trip?"
I still cannot believe I yelled at every guy at the bar "you wanna get in this clam?!"
No she stopped screaming. Now she's eating popcorn. Off a plate. With a spoon.
...i'd have to set their sheets on fire.
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
Just discovered i ordered the nhl center ice package back in september, the operator said there was a note next to the time I called, indicating I may have been intoxicated while calling (no clue why but it was noted)...meaning I was drunk...meaning ill never miss another sabres game...i love me and am beaming with self pride
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
You kept asking us from the backseat if you were driving ok and then you kept talking to your hiccups and yelling at them to "stop it already!"
Dude, I'm telling you, date younger. He brought pizza, made me squirt twice, and then left to immediately go to brunch with his mom.
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
His abs are so defined he looks like a human xylophone.
I was told i took a shot doing a headstand in the backseat then proceeded to barf all over my face
I had no idea you were so talented.
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