what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
You kept asking who was the good cop and who was the bad cop, you said you only wanted to talk to the good one
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
Good lord, they've set up every firework to be ignited by a trail of gasoline at midnight. God save us all.
I'll throw in a blow job for your kind ways. Or another booty call. I'm poor and not very imaginative. This is all I have to offer- the unicorn like wonders of my vagina.
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
Why is your name on a gluestick in a plastic baggy stuck to my door?
Thanks for walking over, a conversation about David Bowie's dick as a muppet is exactly what my day was missing.
I am the slutty bisexual glue that holds this friendship group together.
I woke up naked on his boat with a cowboy hat on with a boat cover over me... Thank you tequila!
Drunk me obviously wants to fuck up my life
It's like I have an arch nemesis, and it's me
He? As in you personified your dick?
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
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