i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
you would pick up someone in the library
at 4 in the morning i heated a family sized mac n cheese for a minute and decided to eat it frozen cuz I didn't wanna wait for that long
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
just heard this guy tell a story about how he got boat head. i want his life
I mean, once you help another girl drunker than you zip her jeans you can't help but be friends after that
I can't wait to hear about your drunken cab ride to planned parenthood at 2pm
you left saying you wanted to "go piss on that girl's doorstep" and we didn't see you the rest of the night
that actually explains a lot
He stole a bottle of grenadine from the bar. And got arrested. His new cell mate is going to love his bright red lips.
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
He's drinking on a hospital bracelet, the fuck's your excuse?
So, Cheetos don't microwave great.
one of my students asked me today if i was having a baby. fuckin 4 year olds and their lack of filter. time to get back to the gym i guess
Randomize
