So when exactly did I get naked and makeout with the statue?
Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
so then you were screaming "GIVE ME KELVINS!" and heating things up in the microwave and no one knew what you wanted
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
I've come to the conclusion while folding laundry and watching porn that I may be dead inside.
How is it that you get into at least one taco related fight a year?
Oh shut up man. Once the police get involved its every man for themself.
Dude. All those hangovers I never had came back with a vengeance. I just opened the door of this car to barf. The car was not motionless. We are on the autobahn.
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
He offered me my choice of the Abe Lincoln or Ben Franklin dick pic.
Sorry my friend with benefits tried to run you over with his car
you just don't appreciate it because you've never been arrested
You texted me a picture of some random naked guy. Did you lose your virginity?
Why does my mask smell like doritoes?
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