She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
I saw two morbidly obese women get winded after fighting over the last motorized wheelchair at Walmart
These are the moments in life you observe a force greater than us at work
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
im sorry for trying to flush a roll of toilet paper down with my puke. probably not great for your toilet
I legit had to pull him off my car. Then he texted me saying 'take me places.' Shotgun getting that drunk tonight
Found half of a five day old piece of pizza behind my dresser. Apparently it was drunkenly set there and got knocked down. It was such a happy reminder of last weekend.
I found a cheeseburger next to my tub once. It's there to shame you, but it always just makes me feel more awesome.
I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
I thought it was a drawer and tried to pull it out and it wasnt a drawer it was the police call button. I hate everything.
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
Seriously bro? Indoor roman candle wars? I guess I'll never see that fucking security deposit again
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