The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
dude if i could bring that prime piece of meat home, id be the luckiest average-looking girl who ever lived
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
just woke up on my balcony. who won the super bowl?
The last text I sent him was about nachos. Frankly, if he can't respond positively to that he can fuck off...
I might not remember all of last night but I clearly remember the part where I humped the mailbox.
Given he decided my interview was a date, showed up drunk and insisted on carrying me everywhere, we weren't off to a good start.
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
The other night he asked if I had a condom and I said I had an IUD. and he goes OMG A BOMB?
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
Party bus got out of hand. Some guy pissed himself. Later, he couldn't find his house keys, so he kicked the back door in.
He sent me a snap with the dog tongue filter. I might have to bench him.
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