you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
So drunk i had to piss sitting down...
Tampa is so boring. I'm dying. I want lots of cleavage at my funeral. If i cant get laid, i want my friends to. I'm that kind of person
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
i cant text you anymore tonight, God gave me two hands for two cups
It's Friday afternoon and I'm drunk. This is how I cope.
nah we got kicked outta the bar after the bouncer saw us putting straws up Chelsea's nose to make her look like a walrus after she fell asleep at the table
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
I don't know if it has occurred to you yet, but you are dating a nymphomaniac, and your work schedule is an interference of my needs being fulfilled. Get home now.
All I want is a camelback full of Jameson and the weather to be cool enough for me to wear rainbow spandex. Ugh. Pride problems.
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
you flipped over the sheets and there was my bed. filled with ding dongs.
Just broke into the basement of my house via my american red cross blood donor card. I officially save lives
How was that girls surprise party last night?
Got absolutely destroyed tried to put somebody's leather jacket on and make out with their mother. You know.. the norm
Did you clean my apartment?
I thought it was a dream, I'm sorry
Please stay more often
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