You're the only person with a favorite bar in Disneyworld
Just had to have the guy at Sprint clear the dried cum out of the trackball on my Blackberry. Wonder if that happens to him often.
he asked if he could put his cape on while he was still inside me.
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
He started to notice that i sleep with every girl he calls dibs on.
just found gum connecting my sunglasses to my floor board. you don't want to know where else it was.
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
Oh, and that ugly chick transformed into a veritable goddess when she came back at 3AM with a handle of vodka and 100 chicken wings
Everyone is sleeping and i'm sittin here in my iron man mask, watchin chelsea lately and tryin to figure out how to smoke through it.
Remember when puke and rally meant a good time? Fuck pregnancy
cool, get new shit, I dnt want the same old if it's my last drink ever
The world isn't ending you idiot. I'll grab beer
he sent me the greatest dick pic I've ever received.
he actually took the time to cut a fingertip off of a glove then put it on his dick like a beanie. he called it hipster dick.
It all started with a game of naked twister.
She's still here. My penis can feel it.
Dude, I think she left with some dude like an hour ago
FOUND HER. I swear this thing is like a metal-detector
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
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