And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
You stayed up for three hours wasted, feeding my rabbit 2 1/2 boxes of girl scout cookies.
you refused to leave the drive-thru at mcdonalds until the cashier took a jello shot
even the AIR tastes like tequila.
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
She was horrified when I asked if they had any strap on chin dildos, I was at a sex shop for gods sake must I be judged everywhere
If I could drive and get you Starbucks I would... But that's probably not a good idea. On account of the drugs.
Well. I mean as excuses for running late go, 'losing track of time in the bathhouse' has gotta be up there on the top ten.
My one night stand ended up seeing me the next morning... For my interview. Guess who got a job.
i walked into her house and she introduced me to her family. i dont think she understands the term booty call
dude, there is no doorman in your lobby and the front door is locked
oh yeah, sorry he's up here at the party. coming now
Only you could get too drunk for taco bell. I don't know if I'm jealous or ashamed. Go to bed.
Randomize
