She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
I thought smoking would make her look better, but all it did was enlighten me to her snaggletooth
Sounds like a blessing in disguise
We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
Dudeeeee, i ordered strippers for my party.
I ordered a moonbounce.
Fuck, you win.
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
How can I politely yet provocatively ask you for a cock shot?
Just pulled a Kenny Powers on a snowmobile
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
Please don't judge me for my hormonal purchase, judge me for my awesome rack.
I just tried to brush my hair with a can opener. Who gave you that brownie
just like fucking own it. stare that cop in the eye and just keep masturbating "yeah motherfucker Im high as shit and this feels great"
I was dreaming of a parallel reality and in the dream I just looked up at my present self and was like "you're high, man"
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
My friends say stay away from him but it’s still 2017 so I’m allowed to make shit decisions until midnight hahah
Randomize
