youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
he took off my shirt and said 'oh my god the legends are true'
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
I woke up at 3am naked and stroking a watermelon.
Walk-of-shaming home in that dress you got arrested in. Six guys called out your name when I walked past. I've never been more proud of us.
I have come to realize that my purpose in life is less musical and more as a filter of alcohol into water.
As long as I don't spend the half the week passed out/fucked up on Klonopin and no one dies, this will be the best week I've had all semester.
He autographed my vag. This fuck just got authentic.
I feel like we should build an island for girls that have committed atrocious numbers of unforgivable sins. We'll call it 'whore island' after the anchorman fashion.
Why are we so great
Like I'm def going to a therapist but I wouldn't change a thing about us except maybe the peeing
My boobs are literally freaking out because I've been wearing a bra for more than three hours....I need to go out more...
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
Don't make me do math I'm drunk and full of chicken
Looks like a sea otter shaved my vagina. Keep an eye out for me this weekend, no one can see this.
Randomize
