VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
DONT TAKE THE KEG OUT OF THE HOT TUB I NEED A PICTURE OF ME DOING A KEG STAND ON IT
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
I'd love to sympathize with you but I'm drunk in a mansion
i know you're at the dentist, but this dick pic was too phenominal to wait and i deserve immediate tit compensation
Cop came to our door looking for you. Something about sex in public and intoxication. I said you matched the description.
You were pouring Patron into the window of the squad car trying to get the police dog to drink it
So thats why that cop beat my ass?
Probably
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
I'm not in bed, I'm driving and puking at the same time.... first for everything
He made her leave because she liked Top-Ramen better than Maruchaun. He's my hero.
just so you know they found you begging for money at the L station. What the fuck did you drink last night?
She pinched my nipples too hard I THINK THEYRE GONE
I TOLD YOU ABOUT GOTH CHICKS BRO. I WARNED YOU
Pooping to opera.
Randomize