69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
turns out I still hate jay leno...even at 10pm.
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
As she was leaving she said "You have an awesome penis, I hope to use it again soon" I need that on a business card to hand out at the bar
Panda onesie. Pizza. Netflix. Wrapped up like a burrito. Screw you guys and your cute relationships THIS IS WHAT INFINITE HAPPINESS TASTES LIKE
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
i spent my Thursday drinking before noon and not wearing pants
i just want to get drunk and cry and have sex with lots of men
dude can you explain to me why i woke up on your sisters floor with moutain dew and chips everywhere
i dont know im at your house.
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
With each thrust he'd whisper "like a ninja." Should I be flattered or appalled?
Double high-fived his wife and her sister on the way out. If I'm not the best mistress ever tell me how.
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