just stared at ed norton's ass for 26 miles. if there was ever an incentive to run a marathon, that was it. my life is perfect.
all i could think was her face looked like a farm accident
What would you say if I got first degree burns on my nipples from drinking coffee topless?
You fed me milk from the beer bong because you thought it would "Sober you up" .
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
Even completely stoned shes amazing on the piano. There are like 7 people sitting on the ground listening to her like she's the messiah.
I don't think you should be sorry for such memorable sex that I yell your name when you aren't around.
Drinking wine from a straw at 6:15 in the morning. This is what college does to people.
Other than trying to finger me on the couch in the middle of the bar a few times, you were fine.
Wow just discovered I can communicate my favorite sex positions using only emojis god bless this age of technology
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
On the way to have sex with my ex's roommate... I have hit a new low
As a side note, can you ask the maintenance staff not to drag their balls on our stairwell handrails. Please.
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
Randomize
