when i'm not drinking i'm making facebook events about drinking
Wow. Thanks for becoming another fan of something on Facebook. You make me want to gouge my eyes out.
Get the fuck buddy a birthday present or not? He def deserves one, but how do I explain the debit card charge to my husband?
I love how kegs are figured into our monthly bills
I've decided to tape numbers to the bottom of my heels corresponding to the number of drinks I can safely consume in them.
For some reason i am carrying prostate cancer brochures. i am nor used to drinking this early.
The chick I hooked up with last night is my girlfriend older sister. Who is in town visiting. Who I just met. Who I just had dinner With. Who is here along with their parents and the whole family. How did my luck get so bad?
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
Just got blown in a rental car. I need to get rear ended more often
I just saw a douchebag with frosted tips & a LaCoste polo with popped collar driving a Call of Duty edition Jeep. It was a cavalcade of stereotypes.
I'm pretty sure my liver died in Reno and my intestines are doing hula hoops around my asshole. The bachelor party was that good.
We'll just charge in there, all pant less and fabulous demanding he give back her ferret.
He's a loser but she says we just don't see the good stuff about him. It's like she's dating the Charlie Brown Christmas Tree.
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
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