i carry sandwiches in my pockets more than any normal person should
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
I'm just going to lay in a blanket cocoon of self pity for the next few months.
we broke up because he couldn't handle the fact that i've slept with more girls than he has. also, i've slept with the girl he's seeing now.
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
You know, part of me wants to die and the other part of me doesn't want to live
But of course I'm in. After all, what fun would the holidays be without trying to find the perfect gift to impress someone you've never met, but need the approval of??
Just called to hear your voice and talk about pizza.
It got to the point where I was so drunk, playing rock paper scissors as a drinking game seemed like a good idea.
You know, I'm starting to enjoy brazilians. One day I'm going to make a therapist very very happy.
A guy I don't even know just ate me out on a washing machine at a random persons afterparty. I came as it was going through spin cycle.Just kept thinking "who does laundry during a party?"
Randomize
