How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
I thought this kinda shit only happens to ugly people
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
well since you're still married, you will be paying for my abortion right?
Literally just stood in the shower and forgot what to do. that hungover.
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
I feel like I should come with a warning like "Orgasm free since 1983"
At my wifes high school reunion. Found out her nickname was 'Back Door Brooke'. EVERYONE is calling her that.
Well call me tomorrow, it's a great story that may lead to me being fired and/or possibly being buried in a shallow grave somewhere out in wine country.
Where'd you go last night?
Don't EVER let me photobomb a group of lesbians again. They made me their "straight mascot" and I ended up singing Donna summer tunes for beers at their apartment complex.
I just woke up on the living room floor at my parents house. The last thing I remember was making a scene at Buffalo Wild Wings because our waitress "Sent the game into overtime" with a 0-0 score
You caught me at a bad time. I'm stoned enough that I'm ready to sleep but also not stoned enough that I wanna smoke again but also stoned enough to not wanna drive anywhere
Sorry for cyberstalking your dad.
Longest 30 seconds of my life
10/10 so not recommended
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