it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
Dude stop singing. Your life is not an episode of fucking glee
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
Its really not funny anymore. I need to stop shaving while i'm drunk
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
he screamed PILLOW FIGHT and hit branden in the head with a pillow that had a fifth of vodka in it. then he asked why he wasnt laughing
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
If you are drunk already, then as your friend I am advising you to stop writing on your dads Facebook wall
It doesn't matter how many beers you've had, it's unacceptable to piss in someone's helmet after a playoff win.
We get an extra hour of sleep. That means we can take an extra shot tonight. Sound logic. Thank you daylight savings.
you were making out with a guy that looked like Fat Albert, I kicked you in the vagina but you didn't stop
Nothing screams fatass like a pizza that doesn't fit in your car
According to facebook, I opened up a can of whupass on some douche who poured all the vodka on the ground.
You called the wrong number but I salute you.
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
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