How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
@ a funeral. fucking miss uuuu
you kept falling over in mid-conversation and you just got right back up as if nothing happened...
Sorry I tried to blow your roommate in your room. I felt more at home there.
When I realised he had a girlfriend I just started telling them about my ex and how I write poetry about him. Which I then read to them. They just gave me pity looks and left me to finish my spliff alone.
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
I bought everclear. Bring your party pants and some addies
You're not gonna punch me in the face again are you?
If you take a couple more shots you won't even know he's a mormon that drives a mini van.
This guy on the bus keeps leaning over and sniffing my hair.
All I remember is laying in that secret hideaway closet, naked, with a beer cowboy hat on and you walking in and sitting down crying because no one would have sex with you
Is there a polite way to say "Sorry for your head injury but I still want to hook up"?
My hands are stained pink. I look like I fisted a muppet.
It's like fucking tetris in this bed
The problem with adderall is that no matter what I'm doing, I feel like it was the most productive thing I've EVER done.
Did you alphabetize our spice cupboard again?
...You'll thank me later.
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
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