The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
I think it's safe to say me, swords and vodka can never be aloud in the same room again.
I'm standing in line at the liquor store and they're making popcorn.
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
If you can count on one hand the number of times you have actually, truly nearly died this month, then you are not really living yet.
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
You can laugh all you want but 99 grapes is a lot stronger than what you were drinking.
I think there's an ice cream truck out back, but there's no way I can get pants on in time to catch it
we received free cupcakes at the first bar, and then I at the second bar i hooked up with a fat chick from Cincinnati on the patio.
you win some, you lose some.
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
Decided to stop by the store on my walk of shame. I must really look like shit, a six year old girl just walked up to me and said "my mommy wanted me to tell you Jesus loves you." Thanks kid.
It's my day off, I'm going to Target to check out Moms in yoga pants
Do you know who changed all my phone contacts into characters from Harry Potter?
He Who Must Not Be Named.
Fuck you.
Randomize
