They thought I was the paid stripper pretty much, and a lady tried to set me up with her nephew and then wanted to get my number for lesbian daughter... A typical night for me
You spent most of the night crying and throwing leftover meatballs at the neighbors dogs
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
I didn't just get this from the chlamydia fairy.. You should probably get tested.
You dont lie about slip and slides
Sometimes crazy just comes naturally. I don't need booze to say that on occasion I feel the need to rip off my asshole and throw it against the fridge to see if it sticks.
I just can't promise there won't be a reason to hit you in the face with a dildo again in the future.
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
You tried paying your tab with the coaster
I just woke up butt-naked in bed with a guy I've never seen..I reached into my bag next to the bed to get my phone and found a bag of shrooms, a handle of vodka, and 600 dollars that I've never seen. what do I do
enjoy it.
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
We have been dating for 5 months. I'm friends with his sister. Yet my number in his phone is still saved as "hot bartender"
There is a huge naked guy in the kitchen with the boner of a lifetime and what I believe is an assault rifle casually resting on his shoulder.
I almost suffocated in that mask but she kept calling me Jeremy so I kept it on.
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