windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
Just had a girl agree to give me a blowjob in exchange for wearing my jacket during class. Talk about successful negotiations. Best day of my life
so my daughter wakes me up this morning and i feel like a vibration so im thinking she has my phone..nope my vibrator
buying my parents vodka for Christmas is like buying a normal person socks.
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
I think I love you, but I may be biased because we had pirate sex.
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
Oh god. It's like a broken faucet. My guts sound like a bilge pump clogged with golf balls and cake frosting.
Shoot me. Oh my god shoot me. My moms ex "likes assholes"
your life is not complete until you watch a gaggle of murderous clowns dance to gangnam style.
also, what is the correct term for a shit ton of clowns?
it'll be like the notebook except for with way more of my penis
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
You know the force is loosing strength when Darth Vader can't handle his liquor on halloween.
I woke up naked in a tent. I was more upset that the air mattress had deflated.
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