kristin has been a bad kristin
She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
Meeting relatives from another state drenched in tequila and smelling of weed. I'm gonna kill you for soaking the only bra I brought in Jose Cuervo Gold.
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
Dont worry bro, i'll be the designated kayaker. I wouldnt want u to be drinking and kayaking.
Definition of cool: he wants a back tattoo of three horses running through a "paisley explosion"
How did he even become this person? Like what drugs has he done??
I just hope the day something happens to me my phone just dies, like literally died and will never turn on ever again. I feel like God owes me that much.
"What's your dick like homie" is not really an acceptable thing to say out loud
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
woke up with 8 used magnum condoms bound together by floss around my neck, thats about all im gonna tell you.
Dude, A DAMN CHEESEBURGER HIT ME IN THE FACE!!! WTF was i suppoused to do!?.
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
Randomize