evidently tequilla and lady gaga make me flirt and grind shamlessly with other men infront of my boyfriend.
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
I really need to find a new way to reward you other than head scratches, nutella and blowjobs.
Found your dick twin last night
I wish they could condense everything I needed, nutritionally speaking, into mike and ikes
Can I bring some rope too? It's not too early for bondage talk, is it?
Last night he ate BBQ Pringles out of my boobs...I feel like it was moderately productive
I'm pretty sure my calc professer is on coke. He's just too excited for this to be an 8am class.
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
Where are all your bongs? Your Dad wants to make sure they're put away before his family gets here.
Umm....in my room, on my closet, under the bed and behind my laptop.
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
So I was at my annual OBGYN appointment and when she saw the bruises on the inside of my thigh she asked if I had been horse back riding...I think my burst of laughter then awkward silence answered the question for me.
Randomize
