Last night this chick queefed when I was going down on her. Thinking if you! xo
I assumed she put out when I heard her friend call her "dickbutt"
wait a second... your telling me you want me to take you to the bank at 10 on a tuesday so you can buy a blow up pool and fill it with beer?
yes... and buy you lunch
Now that Steinbrenner is in heaven he's going to make Jesus cut his hair
Fuck now we have to have sex
What?
In a bet, need to win
I took a shit in your bathtub. Nothings off limits
at what point last night did we decide it was okay to let me hitch hike to another bar?
Then you started screaming that this was the first time you did e and that you had a 4.8 gpa, that was right before you almost suffocated between that one girl's tits.
It was worse than that time I did shots of BBQ sauce and pierced my own ear with a thumbtack
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
Your trash is full of condoms and yoohoos what a great life we live
well I've taken an Uber to my weed dealers twice in the past 2 weeks so it's going well since I sold my car
He took some pill and now he's on all fours demanding we give him chips from the dog bowl. Come get him.
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
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