so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
i feel like i am carryihg a baby. a baby made of alcohol.
I'm chatting with a girl missing a front tooth. I find it quite distracting. I'm sure you have deduced what bar I'm drinking in on this monday night.
Care to explain the single rose and the package of "Cowboy Moustaches" I found on the porch?
My liver is whispering mean things about me to my kidneys. It's a fucking miracle I'm not hungover. Lol
I know I say this every year but 2015 will be the year I finally have sex with David's sister
Over 14,000 people at my school and the kid I went home with last night is IN MY FUCKING LECTURE
I'm just so full of love and alcohol
I brought an already opened bag of trail mix from home to snack on today. Some motherfucker ate all the m&ms out of it. I hate my roommates
I think the hamburger goblin stole my cigarettes. I left my purse behind her table and they're not in it now.
Would it be inappropriate to meet you at the airport after your family vacation so I can tell you all about the amazing sex I have been having?
The gate guard just said to me, "I almost didn't recognize you in uniform. Welcome back." I think I need to lay off the booze.
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
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