At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
You saying I have a drinkingg problem is like saying Superman has a flying problem.
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
Sober me is really good at getting to the airport on time. Drunk me is really good at shitting my pants. Do you know how much pants cost at the airport????
Well I blew a guy I barely know in full view of a homeless camp. That's pretty tame for me.
Two things: Why did I wake up in a pool of blood? And am I still invited to the wedding?
No idea. And yes be here at 4
Good thing I left work early to shave my balls because traffic sucked ass, which I was written up for and my reason on the write was "to close on time, have to shave balls for date tonight". Oh yea, that was a bold statement right there
I feel like im becoming the girl who only drunk texts him. I would be in the dog house, if situations like this had dog houses.
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
They started shooting fireworks out of a dryer. It was my cue to leave.
I went to work hungover and threw up in the break room. Told them I was pregnant and then said I quit. I don't have a job now, thanks vodka.
I should probably eat a Plan B. Pill for breakfast. Happy Halloween.
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
I just saw a woman give her infant whiskey tits. About ten minutes ago she was doing shots, and now she's breast feeding. Whiskey. Tits.
Randomize
