he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
Mines from giving head on hardwood floors.
I'm watching this guy on intervention hospitalized for liver damage. He's drinking the hand sanitizer in the hospital room. Say hello to your future.
We fucked in his mom's shower and all I could think about was being too old to be sneak banging while someone's mom was out of town and how much mildew was on the shower curtain. Fuck you, Adulthood.
There are cops on horseback in our back yard
Based off the amount of cat hair on my poncho....i stole a cat last night.
Watching elf, eating a tub of ice cream, and coming to terms with the fact that I haven't had sex in 5 months. Happy fucking holidays.
There would be some who claim I got a little "carried away" or that we "probably don't need that many jello shots". They would be wrong.
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
I want to ride his face like a jet ski
He kept trying to make out with me but I was just trying to show him Shrek memes
There’s so much sex at the hospital I’m beginning to think scrubs were invented to make duty booty easier
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