I thought she had blonde hair
No, Gonorrhea actually
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
Someone in my history class just FB messaged me saying they highly suggest I put my sunglasses on. He is sitting 18 rows in front of me...
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
the realtor just took us to a house I had a one night stand in. I feel like it's a sign.
only thing in my fruit bowl is 4 champagne corks and a jenga piece . Tuesday.
Signs of a stoner: trying everything in your fridge topped with peanut butter to seek satisfaction.
As if I didn't already know that I was in the friend zone, our conversation that included the words "kiddo" and "old friend" really was a knee biter.
Someone messaged me on POF and wished me a Happy International Women's Day. Why do I even bother anymore?
Like either my tits got bigger or I've succumbed to Trumps tiny hand syndrome
When you wake up and wonder why your bleeding and it feels like you jumped into a ceiling fan, dont worry. Ill explain it all when I wake up.
In California. Through an entire game + OT. That’s a long time to have an octopus in your pants.
I just used a bag of jelly beans as an arm weight...I'm not sure what to think of myself
Randomize
