And then I said "flip over. I want to show you something i learned in Afghanistan."
Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
Cop gave me a ticket for public drunkedness, and then I convinced him to drive me back to the party
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
I always have trouble explaining my life decisions to people over the age of 30.
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
My google searches from last night: tetanus shot rabbit bite, Bacardi gluten free
She is sending me pics of her sex faces...which totally counts as sexting in my book
my drivers license is super glued to my shoulder and im to hung over to get it off come and help me
It was a fight. Me vs nature and drunkenness. And nature won. Big time.
Yeah I don't remember how I got home last night
Judging from my pants, I embarrassed myself smh
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
Okay well for one he didn't speak any english but before any happened he made me use the translator to consent
Emergency thong? Check! Suspension bondage is a go!
I feel like I'm in a astronaut outfit like I'm a spaceman & I'm just floating around cause that's all you do in space is float and I'm floating to be in detail
Houston we have a problem
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