we have officially lost it.
Family of uber douches all wearing ed hardy in a hummer taking up 2 parking spots at starbucks. Please be more cliche
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
Swear. I think after passing out in a community college parking lot I can safely nominate myself for the piece of shit of the year award
I've spent the last three hours watching 30 rock and eating marshmallows and ham. I'm considering taking up weed to justify my lifestyle.
Its that time of year where we just drink more instead of dressing warmer
Because of him my new motto is "Keep calm and fuck a guy with a beard". Yes, I am serious.
Shit my boyfriend's roommate thinks thinks: I love getting woken up to the sound of my roommate getting a blowjob
i spent 45 minutes yellng Heather I feel so bad i wanna die and then 45 more yelling I DONT WANNT TO DIE. thats how drunk i was
you ran up to the police and said "fuck the police shit we living in hell ". Then you dropped your Margarita and said "Darby Out" lol
I am the fucking FIFTH wheel. How do you think it's going?
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
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