Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
i just spent the last half hour thinking about my totally irrational and intense hatred of wedge flip flops.
They have edible shot glasses at target.
There really is a God.
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
I'm not sure what happened last night but I woke up next to him and I was wearing nothing but my grandpa's diabetic socks, so I'm letting that fill in the blanks.
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
I knew as soon as he opened a beer with his teeth to shotgun it that I was going to sleep with him. I'm never going home.
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
I tried to steal a Mike's Hard sign last night but it didn't work out
why what happened?
Well it was going fine.. until the bouncer noticed the three foot steel lemon sticking out of my jacket.
There's no button for "gave my boyfriend's cock to a friend" on my intimacy calendar.
don't do laundry while your drunk! i found a ketchup bottle & clothes hanger in the washer this morning!
I smell like Dick and happiness
I think I achieved my goal of being high for 24 hours in the same week I promised myself I wouldn't smoke anymore
she bought my drinks all night, made me breakfast in the morning, and let me use her expensive hair products before i left. best one night stand ever.
Randomize
