I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night
i need to start using my dry humping skills. i was dry humping champion in 7th grade
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
ive penciled you in for a day of excessive drinking
Apparently being drunk on a southwest flight and yelling "TURNUP" during take off is looked down upon in this state.
Did you just send me an ass picture with a quote from the lion king?
What are you gonna do about it?
Shroomed with my best friend'a dad at his wife's surprise birthday party so you can say I have experience in the field
Please send pictures of any nice new years ladies you run across in town, as I've forgotten what women look like.
And here I thought that was one nut sack too many
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
"Fwd: Nice to meet you last night thanks for the tit flash" no recollec. i am officially banned from wearing tube tops to the bar.
there's still a lot i don't remember, like why my iphone's nailed to your wall
Randomize
