wakey wakey hands off snakey
people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
i know we're in college but you cant booty call me at 3 in the afternoon. i dont care how drunk you are.
the only bad part about drinking alone is that in the morning there's nobody who can tell you what you did
Dude idk, apparently telling two drunk chicks 'that's whats up' after watching them lick eachother's face wasn't the compliment they were looking for. I mean I was fucking hammered.
Wow.
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
When they arrested me, they gave me a bracelet with my mugshot and info. When you get one they can be our BFF Bracelets.
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
i think when the guy sitting in the corner singing tells you you're too drunk, you're too drunk.
Seriously. All i can say is im covered in mud, my jaw hurts, i cannot straighten my arm, egg is everywhere, and there is a dead squirrel.
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
I'll just tell you, some how when we were having sex on Friday my collarbone got fractured.
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
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