i feel like a thai whore the morning after the navy left.
Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
Umm went to talk to a client ended up seeing his semi erect penis. This is my life.
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
when I forget a girls name in bed I ask her her middle name then tell her i'm gonna call her that from now on
Watching Fresh Prince at 9am with a beer in hand and he just said to Uncle Phil "Sometimes I worry that I'll never get my life together." I feel like that was a sign from above or something
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
you pushed her into a kiddie pool and knocked out her front teeth... and you still managed to get laid. what. the. fuck.
At this point I think you're just judging my taste in men
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
I was standing in my mom's kitchen in only my neon green thong, eating pizza over the garbage can, and sobbing while he was yelling at me.
She told him that she never wanted to see him again then took his takeout box of bacon cheddar fries and got in the uber saying "for feminism"
I hope Trump leaves Planned Parenthood alone for at least another month. The week got away from me. #whorelando
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
Randomize
