he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
Don't text me when you know I'm doing lines on my phone
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
Would it be tacky of me to tell the two girls I just found out he's been sleeping with on the side that I've been having gay sex with him all semester?
Apparently campus cops frown on lighting a joint off of the eternal flame on Jerry Falwell's grave...
There is is 40 year old penis staring me in the face right now if there was ever a time to be a good friend its right now.
Nobody likes ball hair. Not even gay dudes
I hope I didn’t eat too many edibles just now. I got shit to do today. Like make Jell-O shots and take a shower.
the fact that I've been his fuck buddy for a year, and I'm pregnant isn't bothering me. the fact that he didn't tell me about his girlfriend does.
It's a Saturday night and I am in bed with two cats, a bottle of Riesling, and I'm masturbating to Iron Man. I'm great at being 21.
I just had to ask my drug dealer to "keep it simple for me". Is this a new low?
We've done worse things
There's even glitter on my cock...
I did not shave my legs to sit at home and diddle myself. He better wake the fuck up and put the fear of god in me!
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