Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
I can't watch pbs sober anymore
it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
What can I say? When alcohol is my motivation, I can move mountains.
Drunk me needs to be reminded of my sexual preferences.
at least it wasnt animals
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
How could she say that about my foreskin when she hasn't even seen all the cool stuff I can do with it?
And regarding bottomless mimosas stopping at 1 pm, there was a chick who drove her car into the back of the bar. Blame that bitch, not you peeing in the koi pond.
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
He offered to dress his dick up as Charlie Chaplin to cheer me up.
Keep him.
I'm going to make you a sign to put on your penis to ward others off
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
I did a trust fall off the bar and then almost got into a knife fight over a push up competition. Just another Tuesday.
Randomize
