It's 8:30am and I'm drinking.... this is a new low
We're friends with people in his circle of friends so we're half way in. It's like I've already given him a hand job.
found a ham sandwich in the elevator it tasted so hungry and it was still fresh. dont be mad at me. you know you love ham.
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
She alternated between blowing me and feeding me bites of the sandwich she made for me.
Change of plans. Theres a bouncy castle setup in my apartment complex.
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
Where the royal fuck are you??
The depths of vodka hell.
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
And here I thought that was one nut sack too many
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
Why is there bacon in the couch?
Randomize
