ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
I intend to get homeless drunk
THEY SHOULD WARN YOU WHEN THEY MAKE JELLO SHOTS WITH JACK DANIELS!!! THEY SHOULD WARN YOU!!!!!!!
I vomited in the sink and my bra was in there...I don't even have words to describe this hangover confusion
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
Okay well someone asked "IS HE HOMELESS?" about me so I need to try and find somebody.
I wanted to take a shower but I forgot we made applesauce in it last night.
Thanks for stopping me from letting that 14 year old feel my boobs. Thanks.
I thought your voice was coming from the walls. I've never been so relieved to find you naked in a closet
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
I dropped my blunt out the window of a moving car by accident, tell me everything will be okay
i just looked in the mirror i look like i'm about to film a PSA about prostitution
I lost a fight last night. By that I mean I head butt the bar and busted my lip open.
Taking one of the loudest shits ever at work and I have to say...I'm having a better time than I thought I would
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