She told me a very interesting story, complete with pantomimes, about how she got a habanero seed in her vag
How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
Does your gf have any friends she can hook me up with?
Better looking than her though please.
I puked in the coffee maker. I wouldn't make coffee tomorrow morning if I were you
doing a walk of shame covered in blue food coloring is only embarrassing if you make it embarrassing...actually no its embarrassing on all accounts
if you just come over, i will entertain you
arguing about the color of your bong does not count as entertainment
Yeah but I was the kid who ran over your BMW and is banging your 15 year old daughter... There isn't a cool enough dad in the world to make that work.
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
When you get a chance, you should call Nick. He REEAAAALLLLLY wants to hear you make chewbacca noises.
Discovery: bouncers seem to get really upset about fire
You can't have your cake and publicly stick your dick in it too
what happened to you last night?
I dunno man, i pissed in a urinal, sent you a picture of my vagina and woke up with 25 bar stamps on my arms.. you tell me
oh what is to come when my single life starts with a threesome?
Randomize
